Johnny
PARSONS CROSS
From Darkness to Light, from Hate to Love
A Life Transformed by Jesus Christ
My name is Johnny, I grew up in Belfast, Northern Ireland during a time when the region was deeply affected by conflict.
Life in Northern Ireland during those years was extremely challenging. The tensions between paramilitaries, the armed forces and police, meant that riots and violence were a regular part of everyday life.
For a young person growing up in that environment, it was difficult to feel safe or hopeful about the future. At the age of fourteen, I began drinking alcohol with friends on street corners. Alcohol quickly became a way to escape from the struggles I faced. School was particularly difficult for me. I never felt like I could fit in, and I was often bullied.
The pressures of life around me felt overwhelming, even at such a young age. Eventually, I began looking for a way out of Northern Ireland. After speaking with a British soldier who regularly patrolled our street, I decided to join the British Army. To me, the Army represented opportunities and the chance to build a better life.
Sadly, things did not turn out as I had hoped. The difficulties I had experienced growing up seemed to follow me into my military career. I experienced bullying there as well, and my alcohol use increased significantly as I tried to cope with the pain and isolation I felt.
Over time, my drinking spiralled into alcoholism, and eventually I lost my career in the Army. For many years afterward, I struggled deeply with alcohol and drug addiction. Depression, fear, and unresolved pain from my past left me feeling broken and empty. I carried a great deal of anger and bitterness in my heart, and substances became my way of trying to numb that pain.
My life was a mess, gripped by addiction, loneliness and brokenness, I lived many years of my life on the street, in and out of homeless shelters and rehabs.
I attended addiction groups, participated in various programs, yet nothing seemed to work. Sometimes I left early because I could not face the truth about myself. Other times I tried to stay and complete the programs, but the struggle felt too overwhelming.
On my fifth and final attempt at rehabilitation, something unexpected happened. A friend of mine, who was a Christian, had tried many times to speak to me about faith.
I always rejected what he said. I struggled to believe that God could exist in a world filled with so much suffering, especially considering the pain I had experienced in my own life.
However, just before I entered rehab that final time, he approached me and handed me a small red Gideons Bible. With sincerity, he said, “Jesus told me to give you this.”
I accepted the Bible mainly because I respected him as a friend and knew he meant well. Still, I had no intention of reading it. I put it in a drawer and forgot about it.
When I entered rehab, I decided to stop using alcohol and drugs without the help of medication, which is known as cold turkey.
The withdrawal was extremely severe. I experienced intense shaking, hallucinations, panic attacks, and overwhelming fear. My mind felt completely out of control. The situation became so serious that the rehab staff believed they could no longer safely care for me. They attempted to contact the crisis team to take me to a psychiatric hospital.
Fortunately, they were unable to come that night, so someone stayed with me to ensure I would not harm myself. The next morning, I woke up still overwhelmed by fear and anxiety. I felt completely trapped, as if there was no escape from the torment I was experiencing.
Then I remembered the small red Gideons Bible. I took it out of the drawer and stood in the middle of the living room at the rehab facility. I had never read the Bible before. As I opened it, I found a section that addressed “lack of faith,” which directed me to the Gospel of Matthew. I began reading about the cost of following Jesus.
As I read, something powerful happened.
I felt a warmth begin to fill my chest. I kept reading passages about Jesus calming the storm and about the two demon-possessed men whom He set free. As I read those words, it felt as though a light had gone off inside of me. I remember saying to myself, “Whatever this is, you have to go.” I did not fully understand what I meant, but I knew something within me needed to change.
At that moment, I simply let go.
Suddenly, the room filled with a brilliant white light. I experienced love unlike anything I had ever known. It was overwhelming in the most beautiful way.
Then, not as an audible voice but as a strong inner prompting, I felt led to go to my room. I went upstairs, closed the door, and began to cry.
Years of pain, sorrow, anger, and guilt poured out of me. I cried out to Jesus and asked for forgiveness.
At the time, I did not realise that what I was doing was repentance. I only knew that I was pouring out my heart completely. The moment I did, an incredible peace filled me.
When I came downstairs, one of the counsellors looked at me and asked, “Are you okay, Johnny?” I replied, “Yes, I’m fine. I found Jesus.” They were concerned and asked me to speak with the doctor. After hearing my story, the doctor recommended medication to stabilise me, but I declined. Not long afterward, I left the rehabilitation program.
From that point forward, my life began to change. I started attending church and began growing in my faith. Over time, God restored my life in ways I never could have imagined.
Today, more than twenty-three years later, I am married to my wonderful wife, Jenny, and we have seven amazing children.
By God’s grace, I have been completely freed from alcohol and drug addiction.
I have had to face struggles in my life, with many challenges, just like everyone else. The difference is I have Jesus directing my path, with His Glorious teachings and even though I face trials I can walk through them with His peace and love in my heart.
From the moment I encountered the Lord, I sensed that my calling was to share the good news of the Gospel with others.
So, now, I preach the Gospel to others, bringing the same message of hope that rescued me from darkness into God’s marvellous light.
I want to encourage anyone who may be struggling today. No matter what you are facing, even if you think your life is going well.
We all need Jesus Christ.
The Bible tells us that we have all fallen short of the glory of God and that we all need redemption.
Jesus Christ calls each of us to Himself.
One day, God will judge the world for sin and evil, but in His great love He provided a way for us to be saved.
Jesus, who is God in the flesh, came to earth and paid the price for our sins. He died on the cross and rose again on the third day in victory over death. Now He calls all people to repentance, to turn away from sin and call upon His name.
The Word promises that everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord will be saved.
My life is living proof of that truth.
